A Little Johnny discovers his first swear words on Thanksgiving Day.
After aggravating his mother, he’s sent outside to play.
In the yard, he overhears his neighbours fighting:
“You b!tch!” “You [email protected]!” Astounded, he runs back inside and asks his mother,
“Mommy mommy! What is a b!tch and a [email protected]?”
With a blush, she stammers,
“Well, b!tch is a fancy word for a lady and [email protected] is a fancy word for a gentleman. Now run upstairs and tell your sister to get ready for dinner.”
He quickly runs up to his sister’s room and hears strange noises coming from behind the door.
He curiously puts his ear to the keyhole and hears
“Yes! Put your c0ck in my pu$$y!”
Astounded, he runs to his father and asks,
“Daddy daddy! What is a ‘c*ck’ and ‘pu$$y?'”
In the midst of shaving, his father explains, “Well, a c0ck is a hat and a pu$$y is a coat.”
“Oh!” the young boy replies.
“I wish I had a nice pu$$y to use for Christmas!”
Taken aback at his son’s use of his new vocabulary, he cuts himself across the cheek. “Sh!t!”
“Daddy? What’s ‘sh!t?'”
“Ummmm, ‘sh!t’ is the brand of shaving cream I use. Why don’t you see if your mother needs help in the kitchen?”
Confused but overjoyed to learn so much in a day, the boy runs downstairs, prepared to thrill his mother with his knowledge. “Momma!”
Surprised, she cuts herself across the hand. “F*CK!”
Momma, what’s ‘f*ck?'”
“Well, sweetie, ‘f*ck’ is a special way of carving the turkey so everyone gets a slice.”
At that moment the doorbell rings.
“That must be your grandparents. Answer the door please while I bandage this up.”
The boy runs to the door, flings it open to find his grandparents on the front stoop.
Without a moment to spare, he greets his guests:
“Good afternoon b!tches and [email protected]! May I take your c0cks and pu$$ies? It’s just me right now. My father is upstairs wiping sh!t off his face and mother is in the kitchen f*cking the turkey!”
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